The latest song from her which I am hooked on right now. Love the melody, love the lyrics.. enjoy folks.. 
= c’est moi =
Already Gone… October 14, 2009
The Art of Patience.. October 14, 2009
There are times when I feel like I have certain things which are just simply over my head. Then there are times when I feel like I’m not giving them the much needed attention. And then are times when I am simply not bothered by it all. Sometimes it concerns stuffs, other times it concerns people.
I think I am a rather patient person. Truly. At least I try to be. Perhaps in nature, that is just how I am. I do not like to be rushed. I do make haste but not as often as some people would like me to. I don’t like to just go by things without truly having a lil’ bit of understanding of them. That’s the least that I could do for myself.
I can’t understand why some people simply cannot be a lil’ bit more patient with themselves or those around them or with their surroundings. Is it that hard really?? To just practise a lil’ bit more patience. To give time that lil’ bit more ..well .. time.
I have friends who falls under that category. Dun get me wrong, they are a great bunch of people. Kind, easy-going, compassionate, loyal and many more positive adjectives that you could possibly think of. However, there have been many times when all I truly wish for was for them to have a lil’ bit more patience. A lot of difference that would have made. =| Truly. If only we can learn more about the ‘art of patience’.
= c’est moi =
3 ladies and a gathering.. October 11, 2009
Well, at least it was supposed to be another gathering but ended up, only 3 of us met. Me, Z and P. The 3 ‘cute’ ones. Ahaks.. 
Oh well.. Doesn’t matter. We still had a good, open, downright honest, heart to heart chat between the 3 of us. A lot of experiences, observations and analysis shared. The good, the bad and the ugly side of friendships and relationships. The ups and downs. The obvious and the not so obvious. The what-ifs and the could-have-beens. The pros and the cons. The minuses and the pluses. Top, bottom, left, right and centre – we spoke about a whole lot of issues. And it truly does opened my eyes and mindset a wee bit more than it already is. Well, at least I’d like to think so.
Dun feel like writing down much tonite frankly but just thought I’d leave a word or two. I realise that no matter how long you’ve known someone, how close you guys are/were, how often you meet and communicate, it doesn’t really mean that you know all there is to know about that person. There will always be that hits-and-misses, those lil’ slither of information which you will no doubt be ignorant or oblivious of. Plainly said, you simply are not informed of. Or choose not to know. And I say, leave it at that. I believe that if there are things or information which you are meant to know, you will know. No matter what. Truly only He knows better what you do or don’t need to know. Don’t spy. Don’t intrude. Don’t pry too much. Lest you will find out things which aren’t truly to your fancy. And will therefore cause you unnecessary heartache and pain.
Sometimes we gotta learn to give people the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they deserve it, maybe they don’t. But let’s just put it this way – what you don’t know won’t kill or hurt you. At least that’s what I’ve been told quite a few times. And yes I do think that may just work. Ignorant may not be for some, but at the same time I reckon there are moments when ignorance can indeed be blissful. And necessary for that matter.
= c’est moi =
Waiting.. October 9, 2009
It’s nearly four days in a row this week. Been keeping in touch. Makes my day it seems. But not too much. Dare not make much of it. Afraid, still feels quite afraid to acknowledge the obvious. =| Till when I dunno. Just am right now. Afraid of going against my own principle in life. A good friend of mine always say to me – “Your own happiness first before others.” Otherwise, how are you gonna make others happy?? If you’re not happy to begin with. Hmmmm… She has got a point there. =\ I need to summon all the strength and patience I can get for this. I have waited for this long. Would waiting a bit longer makes any difference?? I can’t answer that at this moment.
= c’est moi =
It’s a funny feeling.. October 8, 2009
Grinning. Smiling & giggling to myself. The heart feels ‘funny’. Elated is the word. What does it mean?? I cannot comprehend myself sometimes. Hoping against hope. Is there justice in doing that?? Hmmmm.. I dunno. For now, I shall go with the flow. May He guides me in my actions always.. amiiinnn..
= C’est moi =
Second chances.. October 7, 2009
Been reading quite a lot about second chances lately. Not sure if it’s a sign or anything like that. A sign of what also I haven’t a clue. But seriously, have been reading or coming across instances of a second chance nature these last 2 weeks. Like a note I wrote a few days back – “Second chances.. sometimes life will hand it to you. And when it does – grab it! Life is too short to be regretting about a lot of things that you didn’t do or say. Make peace with yourself and others. Only then will life open up to you, and thus, you ought to do likewise too with life.”
Second chances.. sometimes I think I could do with a little bit of that. I can’t turn back the time. Or undo the things I’ve said and done. Or perhaps say what I should’ve said. Do the things I should’ve done. I can’t unregret the regrets that I’ve experienced.
Second chances .. yeah, I believe in that. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, I just hope that I don’t let it fly by me again. Everyone deserves a second chance I reckon. And that includes me.
=c’est moi=
Jangan Ada Benci.. (No Hatred) October 6, 2009
A song which I had just come across by pure chance yesterday. A song by Malaysian singer – CASEY – which apparently had somehow managed to skip this music radar of mine those years ago. Tsk tsk.. What caught my attention most was the lyrics to this song.
It fits to a tee of all that I hold so true to myself right now. Jangan ada benci. No hatred. Towards anything or anyone for that matter. No more. Detach. Let go. Live life the way I want to but within the boundaries of His guidance. And mind you, His boundaries are vast and wide. Masya Allah. Do not rake up the past. Nor let the past haunt you. Don’t let jealousy get in the way of doing or saying something worthwhile and uplifting. Most importantly, don’t let bitterness and hatred breed contempt in your heart. Have a listen folks..
=c’est moi=
One week gone.. October 6, 2009
October that is.. I can’t believe 7 days have passed me by in October. Too fast, too quick! Where did the days go?? A lot of things still needing my attention. And sometimes I think my attention span is getting really shortened these days. Sheesh.
6 Oct.. the restart of the Understanding the Quran class @ Darul Arqam. Am glad to be able to attend class again. After such an eternity of absence. Well, not really but it sure does seem like that to me. A friend of mine decided to join me at the last minute and off we went. It was a good beginning but I believe I have missed ayat 1-82 of Surah Al-Ma’ida.. What a pity. But then again, better late than never. Will try my best to NOT miss class anymore. If time permits. Insya Allah..
Well, guess I better get my 40 winks now. The eyes are getting to be slits again. Tsk tsk.. Oh well.. till next time then.. Adieu!
=c’est moi=
Angels brought me here.. October 2, 2009
And so perhaps they did… the angels I mean. The video to my previous blog entry. Enjoy the song folks. I sure did. I enjoyed it most 5 years back. And I still do now.
=c’est moi=
It’s been a long and winding journey.. October 2, 2009
That’s the opening lines from Guy Sebastian’s most famous single – Angels Brought Me Here. It has been such for me. A long and winding journey. These last few months. From the beginning of 2009. I’ve said it once too many times to friends and family, but i’ll say it again. This year has been a year of many FIRSTS for me. My first mountain hike. First time for me to climb yet another mountain within a span of 2 months!! My first time doing a charity drive. My first time baking a whole lot of cookies & getting the house ready for Eidulfitri. My first time going to a karaoke place which only cost $2 per person to sing for a whole hour! I’m pretty sure there are some more ‘firsts’ for me to mention but they simply slipped my mind at this moment. All in all, I do admit – it is DEFINITELY a year of many FIRSTS for me. 2009. And it’s still not the end of the year just yet. 3 more months to go. I know for sure there are a few more firsts for me to do in the coming months.
Been a long while since I last wrote in here. Yet again, I cannot deny that I occasionally have forgotten about the existence of this particular blogspace of mine. Of that, I am guilty. But well, what can I say. There were so many things that were vying for my attention these last few months. Things and people I must say. One thing I dare conclude – sometimes it takes more than one instance for you to truly realise the foolishness of your actions. Or perhaps not so much as foolishness, but naivety. There is still a lot about life that I have to learn and experience. That much I have realised and accepted. There may be some repetitions of certain predicaments or situations which I had gone thru’, and I thought I was wiser of. But alas, sometimes no matter how careful or wary or cautious one is, if it’s meant to happen, it will. That is what I have believed in for the longest time. Only way to pacify myself is – learn, reflect, accept and move on. Although that one last bit is the one which takes the longest, it does get easier as days go by coz time heals all wounds they say. It is only a matter of whether you want and choose to do it, or not.
I’ve long forgo the issue of begrudging someone when they have slighted me or when they have ‘betrayed’ me. Do wrong against me whether in words or actions. Whether with intention or without. Yes I still do feel hurt. Yes I still do think about it & ponder. Yes I do still take some time to reflect upon it and then to forgive and forget (this I try very hard to do!) about the incident. Yes I do still keep mum when you try to push me too fast, to quicken my decision when I am not yet ready to offer it. Yes I am guilty of all of the above, but pray do listen. All I need is a little bit of space and time. I am after all only like a lil’ speck of dust in this infinite space called Life.
Easy it is to begrudge someone when we have been wronged. Easier still to return harsh words to them and ignore them and curse them and say all the nasty things that I could think of . Just to justify my own hurt feelings and for being made the fool yet again. But if I had succumb to that, I thought to myself, it would just mean that I am none-the-wiser than I was a few years ago. And that is not where I would like to position myself at. 
Not anymore. One is supposed to be wiser as years accumulate. Well, at least I like to think so. Not the other way around. Although I do believe the latter could be said for some people.
Anyway, after all that’s been said and done and experienced (by my own personal instances of course), I have come to a conclusion. And I am steadfast in this. Others may take me for a ride; they may hurt my feelings (intentional or not); they may take me for granted, or seek me only when they feel it is necessary; they may take loans from me and take their own freakin’ time to repay the loans etc etc. However, I will no longer bear any enmity towards them. Insya Allah. For the time that I spent on harbouring such ill feelings or ill will against them, I could have put it into much better use for myself. I very much would love to say that I have learnt to let go. To detach. From such negativities. More often than not, I have mentioned the same to my dear friends and family. This is no exception coz it also serves as a constant reminder to my ownself.
With one of my utmost favourite sentences from the Quran, I would like to end this entry: “Verily, it is in the remembrance of Allah that the heart finds rest (and peace).” – 13:28 (Surah Al Rad). ‘Nuff said.
=C’est moi=
